PLEASE DON'T MAKE THEM FEEL ALONE.....WHEN YOU ARE STILL ALIVE!!!!

Welcoming 2013 with special thoughts and moments.......

Dear Friends,

I wanted to scribble down some emotions but I did not know what...
Many ideas popped into my mind but I was not able to choose.
 Some of the earlier posts were imaginary.... some moments were experiences but not all. Some I wrote for someone else and some in general. I thought about some people and then I thought how it would feel the same to me. But this time, I wanted to be purely 'Me'. I wanted to think like me and wanted to be myself. I wanted to make my first post of this year very special, therefore I preferred this. 

It requires two important qualities to read this blog: 'patience' and 'time'.

If you have got both please go forward and read it else leave the idea of reading and come back when you have these two qualities with you. I wanted to introduce it in this way, as I wanted to prepare you for reading a long post, a slightly dragging and a slightly boring theme for many (but not for me).
I hope it is not boring for you too. Please do ignore the grammatical errors, I am not a perfect writer nor a good writer . But please do let me know about the errors to be corrected and your valuable comments... 

Last time, I traveled to my home town was on 25^th Jan 2013, a quick visit for writing exams. While returning I started missing my home.  Well this blog post start from a realization while returning back to Ananthapuri. Five and half hours bus journey, I was thinking about it again and again and then I started to realize how deep relationships are....

Despite of dirty smell of garbage, the danger of a Red killer (Nick name for the beautiful red city private buses) riding over you, fear of mosquito attacks during the busy evenings. 
(You may notice many from kids to grownups playing tennis with the mosquitoes, daily routine for for Kochities- a wonderful real time game, no need of any video games nor play stations...only one electronic mosquito racket is what you need...and the game begins...and You don’t need a sister to play badminton  or tennis anymore) and of course the famous potholed roads and gutters that help to develop many beautiful qualities in one self-‘Patience’ ‘tolerance’ etc 
( Well, taking everything positive is better right? Interesting it is that you can experience the thrill of caterpillar coaster ride in Kochi roads! ) 

Still Kochi is beautiful and wonderful and very special to me...The ‘Queen of Arabian Sea... and I Miss Kochi a lot, these days. I used to feel the smell of spices when I walk through the interiors of 
Broadway and it makes me to remember the history, Vasco Da Gama and more- Kochi as an important spice trading centre. The malls, Shops, Children’s Park, Subhash Park, Amusement park, Info park,  Industrial  Estate, 

Bolgatty palace, Hill palace, Vytilla hub, Airport, 
TDM hall, Jawaharlal Nehru International Stadium, Cochin port trust, Katari bagh, Naval base, 

Fortkochi,  Mattenchery, Marine drive,  FACT, Maharajas college,  St. Teresa’s, Assisi Vidyaneketan, AIMS , KIMS and medical trust, Lots to say about....and She is Growing-Kochi!!!

This post is NOT at all about my home town, I will tell you about it later. The above passage may not be so important one for many of you, considering my theme of the writing. Since Kochi is dear to me and I did not wanted to do injustice to her, I had to mention about her. Without telling about my love for her how can this story be complete??? 

So here it goes...my thoughts...

Last time I went to my home, I could not spend much time with my sweet parents and my little cute sister and I was sad. I thought about their unconditional love and care. What can I give them in return? Love, care etc but is that enough? I do not know. I had a crazy thought, if I be the richest person in this world; 

I would buy all the luxuries not for me but for them.

I have heard an old story from someone when I was small and I wanted to write it down here before I present my poem before you. (If you have noticed all my post in this blog have a similar style of presentation...I won’t call myself an expert writer or a good writer... but still I am a writer and so my mind travels from one thought to another very quickly and I write it down like that, jumping from one moment to another, talking this and that...and it’s not strange why people sometimes call me crazy. I am thankful to all -My parents, sister and friends who always understood me , loved me and respected me for what I’m...Rarely I speak about myself..I think this post is really going to be a long one...and I can’t help it...because I wanted to be ‘Me & Myself’ here.....)

So coming back to the old story I heard, maybe you too might have heard the same story but to make it interesting and new, I have modified it a bit according to my style:

A knock on the door and 6 year old naughty child opens the door and finds an old man looking tired and some people wearing white dress. They spoke to the child’s parents and left the old man there. The child asked who the old man is and his parents told it is his grandpa. 

“Grandpa you are very weak and pale, where were you all these years , did you know how much I missed you, your stories, your advises and playing with you...when all the others of my age had fun with their grandparents, I was wandering here and there with my stupid toys.”6 year old grandson said...

Smile was the only answer from grandfather

Dinner time, everyone was around the table...Since Grandfather’s hand was shaking and his eye sight was not good, he could not have food properly and the food was spilled all over and the spoon was on the floor. It continued for days....

His son and daughter in law got irritated seeing the mess and so decided to lay a mat on the floor and made him to sit there. And they gave the food in an old wooden bowl.

Six year old child said he too wanted to sit with his grandpa but his parents were so stubborn and angry and did not allow him to sit with his dearest Grandpa. 
The little fellow noticed the tears in his grandpa’s eyes but he watched it all in silence, his parents being rude and cruel to his grandpa and teasing behind his back.One day, the son saw his child playing with clay and asked him what he was making. The child without any hesitation and with a cute smile replied that he was making a little bowl made of clay for his dad and mom to eat the food in it, when he grows up.

Those words were so intense; it penetrated deep into his(son's) heart. That day the son, his wife, the grandchild and grandfather sat together in the old mat and had food together. Next day on wards  everyone sat together around the family table and had lots of food and fun. Neither son nor his wife cared whether the food was spilled over or not. They just loved being together.

Story is over and time to think; Time is running...Everyone of us will be old someday. We too will become parents, grandparents. Respect Elders. Love them unconditionally however they are, whatever they are...

Now back to my thoughts... Though it was a short visit to home last time, it made me to think again and again....

Mother was getting aged, even father too. I can’t and don’t want to think of that day when I would be alone in this world without them.... But the truth is since we are born, we have to leave this world sooner or later.

I can see the wrinkles on her face, white shiny hairs, and a lot more aging symptoms. Though she is becoming old, she is energetic and she says her energy arises from us...she loves doing anything for her daughters for making us cheerful. I have learned many things from her, to be truthful, to enjoy reading and writing and to love unconditionally. Mom was cooking a special fish curry for me...and it was so delicious, I could not stop eating...I am grateful for every dish my mom cooks. Sometimes when we are at home we never know the value of these delicious dishes and may not take the time to appreciate it nor do we care about it. But mothers cook dishes with lots of love...and it is a fact unrealized  It’s better to realize it sooner and appreciate it...!!! 

While coming back, my father dropped me in the bus station, I noticed his ageing hands, his weak body, his pain and yet he dropped me at the Vytilla hub, he just wanted his daughter to be safe, my eyes were watery when I got into the bus, not only because I will miss them, but because I will miss the precious time with them, the valuable moments of togetherness. 
When I scribble down this, my heart aches and I need to take long deep breathe.

Mothers and fathers are the beautiful creations of God. Respect them. Love them. Care them. Some may pour lots of love and express it in their words. Some may not express their concern for you in their words or actions, but they love you always. People are different. We have to accept it. But when you get a chance to express your love for them, express it....Never hide it. Maybe a tough parent can become soft-hearted, if you pour your splendid love upon them.

Leaving them in old age homes when you have the capability to look after them is a sin. Please never do it.  What they require most in their old age is your love, care and attention.They may scold you, they may be not agreeing to your decisions, they may take strict actions that may hurt you deep within, but what matters is...They are your parents and you are their child. Pamper them with your love just like the way they pampered you when you were a kid.

Now my poem dedicated to my parents and to all the loving parents around the world:

If you can’t love and care those who gave birth to you, how will you love others? If you can cheat your own parents, how can you remain true to others? I have a request to those who don’t love their parents, please leave your anger behind, just forget what they did to you, how they reacted, forget the torture...It is tough to give up but it is more tough to be kind and considerate. We all spend only a short period of life with our parents.  Do make their life comfortable and your life too. Life is too short to fight, to regret, to keep grudges.

Love is a magic medicine, use it. Love without expecting returns, care without expecting profit. 

PLEASE DON'T MAKE THEM FEEL ALONE.....WHEN YOU ARE STILL ALIVE!!!!

Parents spend so much money, efforts, time and energy, sacrifice so many things in their life only for YOU and what do you give them back? Send them out of the house/ Make them live alone/ Ignore them, when they are old and when they just need little amount of help from you?

Ageing in NOT a disease.It's Part of life cycle!

Watching our parents getting older or becoming ill is one of the hardest things we have to go through. We want to see our parents, young, active and alert always right? Then Love them more...Care them more......they need you always....... 

They did not live life only because they are born, they lived for you.....they lived for making your dreams come true.

For some it may take some time to realize this truth, but never make it too late...later you will only have regrets and pain left in your life.
I am including some thoughts my sister shared with me after showing this writing to her. Before publishing every post, I have got a habit of showing it to my little sister for suggestions and corrections. Her comments are like an energy booster for me always. She wanted me into include this too....

Our parents had time to look after us, but why this generation have no time for parents or family? Technology is developing; science is developing, more and more laws....but....ethics...morals...??? Every invention every discovery claims to save time. Unfortunately there is not even a single second for us to spend for our family?? How can world develop then, if developing,then for what, why and how? Yeah its true world is running too fast now. Everything is a race...a race to gain more money, a race to become more popular, a race to be in highest position, a race to keep up with the trend and fashion. 

Let the race go on...it has too, life is to enjoy but why no some time for our parents and family? If we WANT we will still have time for them...for them who had time for us always...for them who sacrificed their happiness and dreams for us....

Before concluding I have to note down this too here: a few words written by my friend Nimmy in my slam book 

“You always had some sort of an aura surrounding you..."

 If there is such an AURA surrounding me, then that AURA is the blessing of my parents and my grandparents especially my Late Grandfather. They taught me what love is and love is not, what care is and what care is not, what sharing and helping is and is not...I rarely enjoy talking about myself in public, but in this post I think I have talked a lot about me. I only talk about myself with my really special friends. Here I have taken the risk to cross that line. 

Thanks for your patience and valuable time.

Yours one and only

Arya